Three bulls heard the rancher was bringing another bull onto the ranch.
First Bull: “I’ve been here five years. I’m not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows.”
Second Bull: “I’ve been here three years and have earned my right to 50 cows. I’m keeping all my cows.”
Third Bull: “I’ve only been here a year, and so far, you guys have only let me have 10 cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I’m keeping all 10 of my cows.”
Just then an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they’ve ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp.
First Bull: “I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend.”
Second Bull: “I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I’m certainly not looking for an argument.”
They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting.
First Bull: “Son, don’t be foolish — let him have some of your cows and live to tell about it.”
Third Bull: “Hell, he can have all my cows. I’m just making sure he knows I’m a bull.”
There is a mommy stork, a daddy stork, and a baby stork.
One day, daddy didn’t come home for dinner.
Mommy and baby were very worried.
When dad came home late the next morning, they asked what he was doing.
“I was making a young couple very happy,” he replied.
About a week later, mommy didn’t come home for dinner.
Daddy and the baby were very worried.
When mom came home late the next morning, they asked what she was doing.
“I was making a young couple very happy,” she replied.
A few days later, the baby didn’t come home for dinner.
Mom and dad were very worried.
When he came home very late the next morning, they asked him where he was.
Baby just grinned and said,
“I’ve been scaring the sh!t out of college students!”