Choosing a bathroom fixture based entirely on local aesthetics can lead to some highly uncomfortable physical complications.
Three men walked into a specialized home improvement store, each looking for a toilet that perfectly matched their unique living environments.
The first guy wanted something rustic for his wilderness log cabin, so the salesman hooked him up with a custom model crafted out of raw timber. The second guy needed a setup for an Arctic igloo, so the salesman sold him a block of high-tech, reinforced ice. The third guy, an administrator for the National History Museum of Canada, demanded the most prestigious executive model available. The salesman proudly unveiled a luxury musical toilet featuring a hand-painted Canadian flag on the tank.
By noon the following day, all three men marched back into the showroom looking absolutely miserable.
“This thing is a total hazard,” the cabin owner groaned. “Every time I sit down, I spend the next twenty minutes picking splinters out of my backside!”
“That’s nothing,” the Arctic traveler shivered. “My skin immediately fuses to the frozen seat. I have to keep a high-powered hairdryer next to the sink just to disconnect myself!”
The museum administrator sighed heavily and shook his head. “Fellas, your problems are trivial. That machine is far too patriotic. Every single time I sit down to do my business…”
“…the seat sensor activates, the tank starts blasting ‘O Canada,’ and I am legally forced to stand at absolute attention!”
