An old blind cowboy goes into a bar.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,…
“Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things,”…
“The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.”
“The bouncer is a blonde man with a ‘Billy-Club’.”
“I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.”
“The man sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.”
“The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.”
“Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy,”…
“Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?”
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters,
“Not a chance,”…
“I’m not going to waste my morning explaining it over and over.”
? ? ? ? ? ? ?
An old carpenter was blind, but he would sit in the pub carving little figures:
If you asked what he was carving he would always tell you the kind of wood before he told you the figure.
He bragged that he could tell any kind of wood by smell.
Everyone tried to stump him, but he always got the right wood.
A few of his friends came up with a plan.
They got an old lady to lie on the bar.
The old man sniffed and thought and sniffed again.
He told them to turn the wood over so the old lady lay on her stomach and he sniffed again.
His face lit up and he said….
“You tried to trick me, this is the sh*thouse door from a tuna boat.”
