A frustrated housewife bought a new pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to arouse her husband and spice up their dead s*x life.
After cooking his favorite meal for dinner one evening.
She had put them on under a revealing short skirt and relaxed with a glass of wine on the sofa directly across from where her husband was sitting in his chair.
After several more glasses of wine and at what she thought was the appropriate moment, she uncrossed her legs just wide enough so that her husband could catch a revealing view.
It wasn’t long before his eyes focused on the prize and he asked, “Are you wearing crotchless panties?” “Y -e-s,” She answered coyly with a seductive smile. ” Thank God!” he said, ” I thought you were sitting on the cat.” He never saw her glass of wine coming.
A husband and wife are having dinner at a fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, tells him she’ll see him later, and walks away. His wife glares at him and says, “Who was that??!!”
“Oh,” replies the husband, “that was my mistress. ”The wife says, “That’s it; I want a divorce. “I understand,” replies her husband, “but remember, if you get a divorce, there will be no more shopping trips to Paris, no wintering in the Caribbean, no Lexus in the garage, and no more country club. But… the decision is yours.
”Just then the wife notices a mutual friend entering the restaurant with a gorgeous woman on his arm. “Who’s that woman with Jim?” she asks. “That’s his mistress,” replies her husband. “Oh,” says the wife, “… Ours is prettier.”
