10 Signs You’re Stuck in a Toxic Relationship, And You Need To Get Out Now
It’s hard to see that you are in a toxic relationship when you’re living inside one every day. You’ve ignored the red flags and the signs for so long that the bad behaviour just seems normal to you. Toxic behaviour is subtle at first, creeping in unexpectedly, slowly disintegrating the foundation of your relationship until the collapse starts to happen. A toxic relationship will impact all areas of your life from your friendships to your career, finances, home, health and family relationships. It will make you feel anxious and fearful most of the time and it will erode your self-esteem, self-confidence and self-respect to the point that you don’t know who you are anymore.
Both of you could be engaging in toxic behaviour without even realising it. If you are in a toxic relationship, it’s time to get help or make the choice to leave. Your relationship may be toxic if…
1. You are avoiding your partner or you realize they are avoiding you
If the thought of spending time with your partner makes your skin crawl, there is definitely something wrong with your relationship. Spending time alone is healthy, but if you never want to be alone with your partner, it is time to call it quits. The same applies if your partner behaves lie this with you. Never waste your time with someone who doesn’t want to be with you.
2. You always feel you can’t do anything right
If your partner focuses on your flaws constantly without acknowledging any of your positive qualities, it is a sign your relationship is not healthy. Nobody should make their partner feel less than they are. Also, the whole point of a healthy relationship is being with someone who brings out the best in you.
You’ll know it’s time to re-evaluate when you start losing touch with friends and family, or when you start going against your own personal beliefs to keep the romance alive. Here are 10 signs your relationship has turned sour and it is time to get out. If your partner reminds you of your faults all the time, and make you feel less confident, it is time to leave them.
3. You don’t really care if they are happy or not
Every relationship is different. In some cases, partners are more independent than others, but it is okay. However, a relationship is about two people being together, and if you are not interested in how your partner thinks or about their beliefs, it is time to re-think everything. The happiness of both partners is equally important, but you should also care about how your partner feels and the other way around.
4. Your partner doesn’t want you to change
We never stop changing; it is part of our lives from beginning to end. Our experiences constantly shape our personality, and growing is inevitable and also beneficial. But if your partner is insecure they will never be comfortable about you changing at all. However, both of you will change whether you like it or not. Change is not always scary, it can be positive and helpful. But, you should never be stuck with someone who doesn’t want the best for you, because positive changes are how we experience life.
5. You are remembering the past instead of planning the future
Relationships are always fun and carefree at the beginning, and we often look back at those days with nostalgia. But if you constantly look back without moving forward, you are not that invested in your relationship. The honeymoon phase is not infinite. You should want to be with someone who can help you become successful, not with someone who will look at the past all the time.
6. One of you suffers from jealousy
Jealousy appears when there is lack of trust in a relationship, but it is also a common sign of immaturity. So, we already mentioned growing and changing, and jealousy should never be a part of an adult’s life. A child throws temper tantrum, but adults should not.
7. It seems like you fight about the same things every time
If you constantly have the same argument from time to time, it was actually never resolved. This is a sign of a much bigger problem which is lack of good communication. Healthy communication is essential for every relationship. You need to be able to understand each other and listen carefully.
8. You’re on edge around your partner
Relationships should make us feel safe and we should always look forward to seeing our partner. But, if you are annoyed by the thought of meeting them, you need to re-think your entire relationship. If you feel that your partner feels tense around you, talk to them about it, but don’t be surprised if they ask for space.
9. You both lie to each other
Lying is a sign of a lack of trust, no matter what kind of a lie you are saying. This never ends well, regardless of your good intentions. Or, if your partner is the one who is lying it is just as bad. Investing more time in someone who doesn’t care about you enough to be honest is pointless and it is time to move on.
10. You don’t feel like yourself
Never sacrifice who you are for anyone. A good partner is someone who accepts us for both our qualities and faults, and never change just to please someone. If there is something in your partner that you desperately want to change, it is never acceptable to force them to do so, because if you love them enough you will never ask them to change.
Relationships are teamwork and they require two people who want to make it work. If you have noticed any of these signs in your relationship, you should think whether you really bring out the best in each other. It is difficult at the beginning, but in the end you will be happy you listened to your heart.